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in this MARCH issue....

As Guilford County’s only agency specifically focused on family life and parent education, the Family Life Council provides accessible, high quality, and diverse programs, resources and advocacy for today’s families, educators and community agencies.

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Events of Interest
Click on an item below for more information.

Healthy Communities•Healthy Youth
Level I Facilitator Training
Wednesday, March 23, 2005 from 5:30 - 7:30pm

Couple Communication
Wednesdays, April 6th - 27, 2005 from 6:30 - 8:30pm

How Not to Marry a Jerk (or Jerkette)   
Thursday May 19, 2005 from 7:00 - 8:30 pm

Toward a Growing Marriage
Saturday, April 23, 2005 -  9am-3:30pm

Marriage Mentoring: Choosing Content for Your Program
April 25, 2005 6:30 - 8:30pm
Call LaMonica Mitchell to register

Active Parenting Now                           
Wednesday Series-  7:00 - 9:00pm
April 6, 13, 20, 27, and May 4, 2005

3 T’s to Get to Know Someone

How do you really get to know someone? Many adults enter relationships wanting to believe they really know each other, but they are at least a little afraid that there might be another side to that person. Most people forget these three simple strategies for getting to know someone.

Time: As logical as it may sound, you cannot really know someone until you have spent time with them. Love at first sight may be romantic and exciting, but it is not based on substance. Initial feelings of attraction will fade over time. To build a strong relationship, the initial attraction should lead to time spent together for the purpose of getting to know and understand each other. Some experts suggest it takes a minimum of 3 months to begin to see problem patterns in someone else’s behavior.

Talk: Talk and listen to each other. Share information about what you believe, what you want from life, what your past experiences have been like. What do you think about men's and women’s roles? Do you want to have children? What was your parents' relationship like and is that what you want in your own adult life? A surprising number of people assume that if you love someone they will always agree with you. In fact, it is less important that couples agree with one another on everything and more important that they know and respect one another.

Togetherness: As necessary as time and talking are for getting to know someone, a lot of the important things we know about others we learned accidentally. You begin to really know someone when you have seen them in action in many settings – having fun, working, frustrated or angry, playing with children. This togetherness allows you to experience not only their best moments, but also their less than best moments.

Adapted from the "How Not to Marry a Jerk" Curriculum. Click here to learn about the next program in our community.

How to... date for under $20 in the Triad

Tired of the old "Dinner and a Movie" Routine? Need to work within a budget? Whether you are single, newly married, new parents or enjoying retirement, dating is a great way to spend time with someone and let them know that you care. But you don't have to break the bank to do it! Check out these ideas and see what fun you can have discovering the Triad, while you build on your relationship with each other.

  • Meet at a bookstore or public library and check out the latest books or sit and talk about a travel destination that you found in the travel section.
  • Take a trip to the Piedmont Triad Farmers Market and pick up some fresh vegetables, fruits and flowers.
  • Get competitive - play each other in a game of soccer, flag football, bowling or even a game of cards.
  • Take a trip to the Greensboro Historical Museum . After you’ve toured the museum, grab a bite to eat at one of the many restaurants in walking distance: Solaris, Café Europa, Ganache or Georgies on Church street.
  • Go to a place of worship together.
  • Have a candlelight dinner at home with your favorite take out or even a homemade pizza.
  • Volunteer together to help make our community a better place. Pick an organization that you both care about and give your time.
  • Tour the Weatherspoon Art Gallery on the campus of the University of North Carolina at Greensboro or other local galleries in the Triad.
  • Take a day trip to a nearby Triad city and check out what’s new in their community. Places to try include Winston-Salem, High Point, Lexington, Burlington, Thomasville, or Kernersville.
  • Attend a local college baseball game in the spring and support one of our many Triad teams.
  • Pack a picnic and go to the park for the day to enjoy the great outdoors. Greensboro Bicentennial Gardens, Greensboro Arboretum, and Country Park are all excellent starting points.
  • Visit the High Point furniture stores and plan your “dream house”.

Did you know? Here are some Ideas, information, and some intriguing thoughts.

 Marriage statistics from a survey of 1000 men, 569 of which were married and 441 of which were single. This survey was published in the 2004 State of Our Unions Report: The Social Health of Marriage in America, by the National Marriage Project at Rutgers University. Click here for the complete report, http://marriage.rutgers.edu.

  • 94% of the married men said that they are happier being married than being single.
  • More men are waiting longer to marry.  In 1970, the average age at first marriage for men was 23. 
    In 2004 it was 27.
  • 74% of the single men surveyed reported that they were postponing marriage because they want fun and freedom at this point in their lives.
  • Other reasons men said they had for delaying marriage:
    • Challenges of finding a mate
    • Time constraints on dating by work obligations
    • Need to reach specific financial goals such as a house or a "nice" wedding
  • 22% of men surveyed said marriage is not for them.  This group is much more likely to mistrust women, worry about divorce, and believe that marriage means losing your personal freedom.  Opinions like these often come from men raised in non-traditional homes or raised without an involved father in their lives as children.

"Creating a Marriage Mentoring Program" taps into a community need.

On February 28, 2005, 34 people attended a one-night training on creating a marriage mentoring program.

  • Participants were from congregations in Alamance, Davidson, and Guilford Counties and as far away as Virginia.
  • The workshop focused on
    • the benefits of mentors for newly married couples,
    • key elements of a successful program, and
    • strategies for implementing a program.
  • There were representatives from a few congregations who have an active marriage mentoring program on hand to explain what they do and how they have made mentoring work in their setting.
  • 100% of participants said this workshop provided them with useful knowledge and skills.

If you missed this program or want more information about mentoring, a follow-up program is being planned. To learn more, contact LaMonica Mitchell at lmitchell@flcgso.com.

"Marriage Breakthrough " was a success!

On Saturday, February 19, Marriage Educator Kimberly Lilly, MS, and her husband, Shawn, presented a dynamic one-day relationship workshop based on Michelle Weiner Davis’s Marriage Breakthrough series. In attendance were 17 people from all stages of relationships – engaged, newly married, married for many years.

“This was a wonderful day – informal, positive, and engaging.” 

"Some ideas I will use right away are: changing my actions, identifying what fills my partner's "love tank", putting my relationship into gear, and actively pursuing relationship goals."

More marriage enrichment opportunities are planned. Click here to check out the calendar.
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Call For Content
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